Sunday, November 06, 2011

This Week with Christiane Amanpour - November 6, 2011

Guests:
Speaker John Boehner (R-OH)
Fmr. Sec. of State Condolezza Rice
Niall Ferguson
Arianna Huffington
George Will
Matthew Dowd
*********************************
Amanpour: good morning Cain and Gingrich
are like Lincoln and Douglas if they had harassed
women and Abe wasn’t gay

Karl: Herman Cain says there was either no
settlement or several and anyway the real
issue is Rick Perry needs to apologize to America

Perry: no was Jose!

Karl: Cain is still beating Romney and Rick Perry
is hopped up on painkillers and had his
best week ever

Amanpour: 74% think the country is on the
wrong track and disapprove of Obama
and Congress

Amanpour: Speaker Boehner what are
you doing to create jobs?

Boehner: we passed a free trade agreement
with Panama!

Amanpour: time for golf then

Boehner: the House is passing bills like crazy
but then they die in the Senate

Amanpour: what about taxing millionaires?

Boehner: it’s a little know fact that most rich
people are actually poor

Amanpour: really?

Boehner: we have a spending problem!

Amanpour: you said you are willing
to raise revenues

Boehner: yes by cutting taxes

Amanpour: Interesting

Boehner: I am willing to cut taxes if the
Democrats will agree to cut spending

Amanpour: what is your biggest regret?

Boehner: taking this stupid annoying job

Amanpour: I see

Boehner: I thought Obama and I could agree
to wreck the government but we couldn’t
it’s so sad
[ weeps]

Amanpour: the Super Committee won’t
agree will they?

Boehner: If it was easy I would have tried it!

Amanpour: what about draconian defense cuts?

Boehner: do you know how much spend
on defense now?

Amanpour: could you and Obama still agree
on a big debt cut package?

Boehner: no because he was mean to me

Amanpour: there is a massive income gap
in this country and spending cuts could hurt people

Boehner: oh that could never happen

Amanpour: no?

Boehner: the best way to help poor people
is to help rich people

Amanpour: there is less social mobility in
America than elsewhere

Boehner: the reason I came here 21 years
ago was to pass checks out from lobbyists
on the House floor and I did it

Amanpour: you must be so proud

Amanpour: you said you understand Occupy
Wall Street complaints but Rep. Cantor
called them a mob

Boehner: I understand the frustration but
it’s class warfare and it’s immoral

Amanpour: what about shared sacrifice?

Boehner: no one suffers more than the
rich in America

Amanpour: People despise Congress

Boehner: that’s the media fault

Amanpour: okay

Boehner: the Founders designed Congress
not to work and we should respect them!

Amanpour: Is Romney the stiffest candidate

Boehner: undoubtedly

Amanpour: what about Herman Cain?

Boehner: I’m trying to create jobs Christiane!

Amanpour: Can you work with Obama?

Boehner: I am the most honest person
in Washington - everyone knows exactly
where I stand

Amanpour: for the lobbyists that pay you

Boehner: exactly

Amanpour: thanks for coming

[ break ]

Amanpour: the economy is still weak

Ferguson: people have too much personal debt
which keeps them out of shopping malls

Will: that and the unwashed masses

Huffington: Boehner is waving laminated jobs
plans and Obama is standing on crumbling
bridges but no one does anything

Dowd: the America people get to decide whether
we are in a recession

Amanpour: I trust them

Dowd: no Republican or Democrat has
any clue on how to rescue America

Amanpour: what about the Super Committee?

Will: they will pretend to let the big cuts happen
and then Congress won’t make the cuts

Ferguson: Presiding over a recession looks
like a miscalculation by Obama

Huffington: politicians all over the world
have made that mistake - look at Greece

Ferguson: America needs to export to Europe
and they’re circling the drain

Dowd: the average American is very worried
about Europe

Amanpour: are they really?

Dowd: I mean who’s in charge?!

Huffington: corrupt oligarchs!

Amanpour: what about Herman Cain

Dowd: the left and right are equally to blame
because we all break into tribes and throw
rocks at each other

Amanpour: thank you for that bunch of
tired clich├ęs Matty

Huffington: he was always an idiot so why are
we even talking about Herman Cain?

Ferguson: well you can certainly be stupid and
still be elected President

Amanpour: he doesn’t know that China has
had nukes for 40 years

Ferguson: that level of imbecility should
disqualify this twit

Amanpour: Is Mitt a flip-flopper?

Will: his only strong belief is that he should
be President

Dowd: conservatives fear that as soon as he wins
the nomination he will swing to the center

Ferguson: well he should

Huffington: don’t forget Jon Huntsman

Dowd: the Gingrich wave is coming!

Amanpour: is Rick Perry drunk or on painkillers?

Dowd: possibly both

Will: Mitt Romney will probably be the next
President because he is our Henry of Navarre

Amanpour: he starved the people of Paris until
they had to eat rats

Will: then he’s perfect

[ break ]

Amanpour: do you think Obama is doing a good
job on the war on terror?

Rice: I have to admit he is - the death toll is
very impressive

Amanpour: shouldn’t Obama leave at least
10,000 troops in Iraq?

Rice: OMG you are so right Christiane

Amanpour: didn’t Obama make a huge mistake
in listening to a bunch of pointy headed lawyers!!

Rice: I know! What was he thinking?!

Amanpour: Isn’t Obama going to waste all
the lives of people who died in Iraq?

Rice: seriously - it’s like you read my mind

Amanpour: Isn’t it crazy to leave Afghanistan!?!

Rice: it’s insane sister!

Amanpour: Shouldn’t America get tough on Iran!?!

Rice: well we can’t attack Iran if we don’t have
troops in Iraq

Amanpour: GOP candidates seem proud of
their lack of knowledge on foreign policy

Rice: oh Cain was just joking about Uzbekistan
- I think

Amanpour: he doesn’t know that China already
has a nuclear bomb

Rice: he must have misspoken -
no could be that ignorant

Amanpour: are you sure?

Rice: look George W. Bush didn’t know anything
either and his foreign policy turned out great

Amanpour: well I feel better now
**************************************

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